Tag Archives: getting arrested

Orgasms and Arrests

Take 2 tablespoons of sex and mix with a big heaping cup of police activity, and you know what you get?  My evening yesterday!

So, I was on my couch watching the Phillies game last night when GF decided to come over after a happy hour. It was about the 3rd or 4th inning and the game was pretty slow.

Watching baseball on TV is definitely not one of GF’s favorite pastimes.  As she might have been a bit bored and feeling a little frisky after an unconfirmed number of alcoholic beverages at happy hour, she kept herself interested by trying her best to “distract” me.

One thing led to another, the TV was shut off, and we engaged in uhhh… errr… a competitive game of Scrabble. Yeah, that’s it!

Back and forth we go, consonants and vowels flying all over the place. 

Then out of the blue, right outside my window we hear:

“PUT YOUR HANDS UP! GET ON THE GROUND! NOW! MOVE MOVE MOVE!!!”

I live in the Adams Morgan area, and if you haven’t heard – there’s been a pretty hefty increase in the crime in our area recently.

So, when we hear all this screaming and banging, we’re not sure if someone is getting mugged, or someone is getting arrested. GF and I look at each other.  We’re conflicted.

What do we do? Look out the window and make sure everyone is safe or finish? The game was close.  We had put so much effort in….. So, we did what any other good DC residents would do in this situation:

We said, fuck it – robbery be damned, we’re finishing!

I wasn’t an english major, but when it comes to Scrabble I am definitely cunning with my linguistic skills.

Faster and faster we made our moves…

Double word score! 

Triple letter score! 

Points pile up faster than we can keep score. 

The intensity of the game matched only by the sirens, yelling, and intense police activity right outside my window.

I pull the last tile out of the bag….. a G!  Only 2 points?  Damnit….. this is going to be close.

Folks, here’s the thing about Scrabble.  A true master knows that winning isn’t about the tiles you pull… it’s how you play them.

I had her right where I wanted her.  Down 23 points with only my turn left to play.

My move was as quick as it was stunning.  I play the G.

BAM!

TRIPLE WORD SCORE.  Take that!  24 points!  I win!

GF screams.

Perhaps it was in disbelief.  Perhaps it was the shock.  Perhaps it was just a release from the intesity of the game.

Either way, I did what any other self-serving boyfriend would do in that situation.

I covered her mouth.

The last thing we needed was someone else getting arrested.

 

Orgasms and Arrests