Some people found my blog by searching for “sex boys and man,” “50lbs overweight,” and “Tighty whitie dude.” What does this say about my readers (or my writing for that matter!)?
Whenever I eat a nice salad and some fruit for lunch, I’m still hungry. I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ll never feel full unless a slab of cow and a cookie are somehow integrated into my meal.
Dasani is “Purified water enhanced with minerals for a pure, fresh taste.” So they are unpurifying the water to make it taste more pure?
I use a Swingline stapler everyday. I wish it was red.
I hate it when the car in front of me leaves their blinker on. It makes me want run them off the road, NASCAR style.
I was once told by a Rabbi that Jews are not prudes. I think this needs to be better communicated to the Jewish women of the world.
I’ve been pulled over for speeding by a bicycle cop. He had a siren and lights and everything. Ironic thing? I was on travel presenting at a big meeting for public safety officials.
I often wonder if I farted on a skunk, would it smell better?
I’ve always hated September – because that’s when you go back to school. I haven’t been in school in more than a decade, yet I still hate September.
My work colleague has a hand drawn picture above his desk that says “I love you Dad, Plese take it to work!” He doesn’t have any kids.
I like drinking hot tea, hot soup, hot chocolate, etc but I can’t brush my teeth with either hot or warm water. It’s disgusting.
When I’m walking up to an elevator, I secretly race anyone nearby so I can be the first to push the up/down arrow.
Whenever someone talks about “Change Management” for some reason a picture of a zoo-keeper pops into my head.
I like making completely random analogies to help explain things. The more obscure, the better.
My life is sort of like a feather duster. I own it, I know I can put it to good use, but I’m too lazy to. So instead I hire someone else to clean up my dust and mess.
Scenario: 2 guys at work are in the bathroom, both in stalls. They both flush at exactly the same time. Invariably, one guy will pause in his stall and let the other wash his hands and leave, in order to avoid having an “embarassing” meeting of the crappers at the sink.
And those are your Randomly Rambunctious Remarks worth blogging about…… or not.